Internet dating opinion
A few months before my initial swipes, I’d gone through a messy breakup with a man I dated for over two years.I truly believed he was the person I’d marry, and that I’d never have to worry about rejection again.When I found myself newly single, I turned to online dating in the hopes of easing my fears that no one else would ever accept me as I am, that lightning doesn’t strike twice. In this virtual world, I could pretend my disability didn’t exist.Not one to be deterred, I persevered, downloading every possible dating app and creating accounts on various dating sites. I kept up with this facade for a while, messaging matches who were none the wiser.So, we spent our entire date sitting directly below the painters, eating dinner and making strained conversation with wine-fueled laughter and painting instruction in the background. Following that disaster, I promised my date I’d get his money back.As soon as the company refunded our tickets, I never heard from him again.Finally, I took the leap I’d been so afraid to make, opening up about disability to strangers whom I hoped would appreciate my honesty and perhaps send me a message.
I realize some people are hesitant to date a human who experiences the world sitting down.But I wasn’t helping the situation by keeping the existence of my disability concealed, springing it upon people only when I thought it felt right.In retrospect, this served only to contribute to the stigma I usually work so hard to fight. In every other area of my life, my disability is front and center.I ended up going on one date with him, and then another.For the second date, my bagel suggested a painting night (a social event that involves paintbrushes, canvases, acrylics and, usually, wine) since I’d told him how much I enjoy them.