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For the first date I was next to Doug – three minutes of which 10 seconds were spent downing my complimentary glass of wine, one minute drawing big hearts around my number on his sheet so I was guaranteed one ‘match’ and then the remaining time gazing around the room. One guy had tears in his eyes when in under 15 seconds he had told me about his mental health problems and another when asked why he had come told me about his past relationship, kept under ‘lock and key’. While I posited the numbers dying in Africa he reminded me how valuable koi carp are.
Actually once all had kicked off I had a brilliant night. Zsott, which is a name, not a typo as another Tab writer claimed, told me as he leaned in far too close about his hatred for America and how much he missed his hometown of Budapest while sweat dripped off his eyebrows. My particular favourite story was a third year engineer’s revision techniques, writing formulas upside down on a t-shirt and not taking it off for weeks, so every time he looked down he was learning.
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